If You Are Not Singing and Dancing in This Very Moment, Why Not?

Ohbeeb Cavalcante is the connoisseur of joy. She describes joy as feeling the gift of every breath, being alive with gratitude and love. Ohbeeb calls herself a love activist. In this interview, Ohbeeb discusses being beautiful and ageless.

J: Let me share the memory of the first time we met.  Normally, when I first meet someone, I take in the details of who they are: male or female, young or old. I was surprised to later realize that I didn’t think that at all, I thought to myself, “This woman is so beautiful”.  When I think of getting older, what I would really love for myself is for people to see what I represent, and have it take center stage to how old I am…

O: I get what you’re saying. You want your essence to speak loud and clear…

J: Thank you!

O: …and to take over any of the details of the personality…

J: I couldn’t quite put it into words, but I saw your essence before I saw any details, and I was really amazed by that. It made a strong impression on me. I spoke to a friend of mine, who’s 36 and agonizing over getting older, and I said, “We shouldn’t be afraid of that, because you can be beautiful and ageless”.  She said, “Show me any examples!”  I said, “I know one, and I’ll introduce you!” What bothered me ever since is how few examples we see. I’d like to live in a world where it’s a norm, not an exception.

O: I agree completely.

J: You spoke to me about the concept of the Ageless Elder, and I love it!  You also mentioned the concept of a Goddess, and that’s exactly what women should be – the more experience we get, the more joyful and flowering we should get, the more our essence should come through! Why do you think we don’t see it enough? How did you get there? How can other women get there?

O: I have answers. My mother gave me this gift that I am demonstrating. And she gave it to me in a strange way. She was of a Swedish background, a magnificently beautiful woman. Not confident in any way, not educated, from the Old World. In her later years, from the age of 70 to 80, I watched, in shock, as she deteriorated in every part of her beingness. She lost her mind, she had a heart bypass, and she developed all kinds of illnesses. I couldn’t understand what happened. In those tragic last years, she was not living, she was simply breathing but not being ALIVE. I said, “I do not want THAT. How can I do it differently?”  And I started researching, what is it that creates health? And the first thing that came to me was a gift in the form of a book by Harvey and Marilyn Diamond, called Fit for Life.  That was the first book that woke me up to many things concerning what builds health. And it was a huge shock. I took it seriously, and became passionately interested in what creates health. And having been called a beautiful woman myself, I also wanted to know, what is the secret of beauty? Of course, I understood that it’s inner beauty, it’s the spirit and the heart that makes us beautiful. But health can make us glow with vibrancy that sets us apart from people who just go through the motions. We feel our aliveness and we rejoice in expressing our unique being. So, that is the answer to the first part, how did I get started in realizing that I could create a reality that felt really good to me, that it showed in every aspect of my life, in my essence, in my very being.

And the reason that there is not an abundance of people demonstrating that, although there are certainly more and more all the time, is that we’ve been conditioned that we are going to grow old, we are going to become decrepit, and have illnesses, and that has been the constant brainwashing…

J: It’s a total myth!

O: It’s a total myth. I haven’t always been a rebel in a sense that I did what I was told to do, I did not know that I had a choice until I was in my forties. It was a huge wake up call. And the moment that I got that message that I have a choice, that I am responsible for everything I’ve created in my life, that was the greatest  gift that I had ever received, to know that I was responsible for my life. And, I suppose, from that point on, I never looked back. I ended the dysfunctional marriage I had been living in, and contributing to for twenty years, based on my antiquated belief systems, and the result of those antique belief systems end up making you depressed, repressed, suppressed, and oppressed, until you look like a fruit rollup, you are so flat! So, my dear, ever since I have been creating a life that I LOVE to live, and I have been rejoicing in the gift of life, I have been celebrating joy, my creative juices have been unleashed, and I am flowing like a river!

J: What does joy mean to you?

O: Joy means full self-expression of gratitude for what is, just as it is, knowing at a deep level that it is perfection. That the universe operates in a balance. There is a negative for every positive, and a positive for every negative, and our job is to keep gratitude and love well-nourished in our hearts. And to me, this is the best job one could ever, ever have. This is the job that fills me with joy. Being who I am, the unique loving being. I say Baskin Robbins has, what, 35 flavors? Well, the flavors of love that we have on this planet, what is it, six billion? And gratitude is the key to happiness in expressing our loving uniqueness. So, joy is feeling the gift of every breath. Joy is feeling the pleasure of taking a step that may even have a purpose, and, hopefully, does have a purpose, so I am not spinning my wheels and needing to be busy to prove to myself that I am alive. I am alive with gratitude. I am alive with love. I call myself a love activist. People say, “What do you do?”  I’ve said, smart-alecky, “About what?” But I can tell you, it’s all about being. It’s all about being authentic, and that brings joy. So, I sing a lot. (Breaking into a song) I sing my love song to the world, I do, and I express the ABCs of Joy!

I’ve heard the most inspiring statement from a Sufi master. If you are not singing and dancing in this very moment, why not? I love simplicity. To me, this puts it in a nutshell. That is the whole spiritual scene, as far as I’m concerned. And I’ve studied religion, I’ve even become an interfaith minister, because the fear between people of different belief systems truly upset me. I am an inclusivist. I don’t want anybody to be left out. And when I saw people in discomfort because of somebody else’s belief system, that really affected me.

I remember as a little girl on a playground, hearing some child say to another, “You can’t play!” And that resonated in my heart so deeply, that I think it became a seed for a lot of my work, the work I’m calling the ABCs of Joy and the Alphabet Game according to Ohbeeb. It is a game that anyone can play, whenever and however they want, for as long as they want, and I consider it one of the biggest triumphs of my life. The universe has given me this gift to share with everybody who wants to play, and everyone is definitely included…

J: Fabulous!